1
You hated fuss,
didn't want our concern,
didn't want to be seen
bald, bloated, dribbling;
clutched the fear and pain
tight to its own house
and we were filtered in
by distant bulletins,
you having laid down how
your wife stood dragon-guard
over the poisoned hoard.
No one can help you now.
2
The complacent heart
has not heard yet -
programmed to trace
the sudden swing right
into that steep street
to see your silhouette
ripple across the glass.
Prohibited exchange
bloodbound or spirit-strange,
what passes for a soul,
cold, selfish, shallow,
must settle to its role:
grief is late and slow
to grasp or let me go.
3
Come in dreams
of argument
where contradiction
is of less moment
than engagement;
come in nightmares
of ward-sedated
self stripped away
letting us say
you went without pain.
Come to me any way.
-------------------------
© Brian Fewster
Published in Staple 49, Winter 2000
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